tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29074309827509660902024-02-19T08:39:09.038+07:00[ parenthesis ]Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.comBlogger352125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-32392874058511265712016-06-15T11:17:00.001+07:002016-10-08T01:14:56.807+07:00My Skincare RoutineAs a part of the beauty series assigned by one of my classes in uni, I wanted to share a bit of my skincare routine.<div>
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FYI about my skin condition: a graveyard of acne scars. Luckily, now I never had any major breakouts, only normal hormonal ones. The scars tho. Huge pores. Super oily on the T-zone and have a tendency to dry out in several places.</div>
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I started getting my skincare game up on the early, second year of uni. I KNOW, IT'S SO BAD. I was 19. Could've started sooner? Before, I used to just wash my face with a foaming (!!!) wash and put makeup straight away, skipping SPF (I still cringe...) and when I'm done with the day, I wiped my face off with micellar water, re-strip my natural oils with a foaming wash, and put my Hiruscar as my scar treatment. <div>
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I have had experiences with dermatologist since I'm 12. I started having major acne problems during my youth. Let's just say, my perfect skin was inexistent when I needed them the most (angsty teenage years where you want to get cute boys AND good grades). Lets just say dermatologists in Indonesia have the tendency to rip us off and giving their own concoction that resulted in an addiction, and once I stopped using them, things got worse. As I get older, I just want to use the over-the-counter ones that didn't give me double acne breakout when I switch or left them out of boredom. </div>
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P.S. I'm not generalising; I believe there are great dermatologist out there in Jakarta. I just haven't found them, and have decided to spend zero energy testing them one by one. If you have one that works great, then awesome. If it works, why bother fixing them?</div>
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Let's start.</div>
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<b><u>AM Routine</u></b></div>
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Cleanser : <a href="https://www.thebodyshop.com/en-gb/face/cleansers-toners/camomile-sumptuous-cleansing-butter/p/p000186" target="_blank">The Body Shop Chamomile Cleansing Butter</a>. It has a balmy texture that takes off everything, from foundation to bulletproof eyeliner to stubborn mascara. I use it mainly because I hate the 'pulling' effect foaming wash gave you. For some people it can feel quite heavy in the morning, but I really like the moisturised feel I get after I cleanse with this.</div>
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Toner : I use <a href="http://hadalabousa.com/products/brightening/#prod1" target="_blank">Hada Labo Shirojyun Clear Lotion</a>. It supposed to lighten your skin, so I was hoping that it will light my skin up too. I notice that my skin is much more lighter, but the acne scars don't really fade with this.</div>
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Treatment : <a href="http://hiruscar.com.my/what-is-hiruscar-post-acne" target="_blank">Hiruscar Post Acne</a>. I 100% credit Elin Ivana for this. It doesn't really improve my dark marks, but it does wonders on my skin texture. I have used this for almost 3 years now. It doesn't make my skin perfect, but it definitely plays a part on improving it.</div>
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Moisturiser : <a href="http://www.clinique.com/product/1687/5089/skin-care/moisturizers/moisture-surge-extended-thirst-relief" target="_blank">Clinique Moisture Surge Extended Thirst</a> or <a href="https://www.benefitcosmetics.com/us/en/skin-care/moisturizer" target="_blank">Benefit Cosmetics Total Moisture Facial Cream</a> depending on what mood am I in. The Clinique is very very light while the Benefit one can get a bit heavy. Sometimes I get dry patches on around the nose and cheek and both are a life saver. Benefit one is very scented though, but it's fairly relaxing.</div>
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SPF : I used to use Biore UV Aqua Rich. It's awesome. Light, non-greasy. Protection wise, it's 50 with PA+++. But since it's getting harder and harder to find it, I use Skin Aqua Moisture Milk SPF 50+ PA+++. It's much greasier and leave my skin oily, but very good if you're putting it on your body.</div>
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<b><u>PM Routine</u></b></div>
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1. Micellar water : Bioderma Hydrabio (blue top, clear water). I used to use Sebium (green top, blue water) but it leave my skin feeling tingly and a bit uncomfortable. Hydrabio is perfect.</div>
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2. First cleanser: same as above. The Body Shop Chamomile Cleansing Butter thingy.</div>
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3. Second cleanser: The Bath Box Goat Milk liquid soap with no scent. Smells awful, but works well for keeping acne in bay.</div>
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4. Booster : <a href="http://kiehls.co.id/perawatan-wajah/perawatan-khusus/iris-extract-activating-essence-treatment.html" target="_blank">Kiehl's Iris Extract Activating Essence</a>. Do I need it? Probably not. But its claim that boost/activate/help things works better over it sold me.</div>
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5. Retinol : Only twice a week. Getting into retinols was kinda scary. I'm only 20 when I started, but cannot deal with the amount of scars I have. Initial breakout happens but nothing major. I can confidently say my skin is better now. I use <a href="http://www.paulaschoice.com/shop/skin-care-categories/retinol/_/Clinical-One-Percent-Retinol-Treatment/" target="_blank">Paula's Choice 1% Retinol</a> only in my troubled areas.</div>
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6. Essence : <a href="http://www.sarange.co.id/detail_product.php?id=27" target="_blank">Sarange Phyto Whitening Essence</a>. To further help the retinol lighten my scars. Korean. I don't really like Korean skincare, but my Mom said it doesn't work for her and it might work for me since I have 'younger' skin. But I think it helps, my skin is much lighter than before, but probably since my 'cocktail' is full of brightening agents as well. It's light in texture.</div>
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7. Moisturizer : same as above. Usually at night, I use the Benefit one as it's really seals everything.</div>
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8. Eye cream : My OG eye cream, <a href="http://kiehls.co.id/midnight-recovery-eye.html" target="_blank">Kiehl's Midnight Recovery Eyes</a>. I suffer from darkness but not puffiness. This is bomb. I can totally see a difference after I pull an all nighter for a 5000 words essay.</div>
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9. Facial oil : Even though I'm oily, I cleanse with a balm and topped off my skincare opera with an oil. Oily people shouldn't be afraid of facial oils. They're cool. I use<a href="http://kiehls.co.id/perawatan-wajah/serums/midnight-recovery-concentrate.html" target="_blank"> Kiehl's Midnight Recovery Concentrate</a>. If I had to choose this and the eye cream, I choose the eye cream more. But this seal everything nicely and I can actually wake up with better skin. </div>
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Haven't achieve that flawless skin yet, but we're going there. </div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-54572008622852221772016-06-15T10:59:00.001+07:002016-06-15T10:59:22.812+07:00Black Wood Cookies<i>This recipe is a favourite one, my Mom used to bake these during Eid when I am little and I will literally finish tins and tins of it by myself.</i><br />
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Black Wood Cookies</h3>
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Ingredients:</div>
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225 grams of butter</div>
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210 grams of caster sugar</div>
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Half a teaspoon of vanilla</div>
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Pinch of salt</div>
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3 whole eggs</div>
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100 minced, roasted cashews</div>
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50 grams of cornflour</div>
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30 grams of powdered milk</div>
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25 grams of cacao powder</div>
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1 teaspoon of baking powder</div>
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230 grams of flour</div>
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100 grams of whole roasted cashews</div>
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Chocolate cereals for topping</div>
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Method:</div>
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1. Preheat the oven to 160 degrees Celsius. Prepare tins by lining them with baking paper. Cream the butter and sugar, incorporate eggs one by one.</div>
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2. Sift all the dry ingredients. Mix in the dry ingredients until all incorporated. </div>
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3. Remove from the mixer and put in the minced cashews. Mix with wooden spoon.</div>
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4. Scoop the batter into small balls, top with cashews and cereal.</div>
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5. Bake until set, remove from the oven, left to cool for minimum 30 minutes.</div>
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Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-41399608916135956532016-06-15T10:44:00.001+07:002016-06-15T10:44:11.511+07:00Macaroni Panggang<i>This recipe originally found in www.kulineri.com, but I have adapted and changed several components.</i><br />
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Makaroni Panggang</h3>
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makes 2 small pyrex pans</div>
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Ingredients:</div>
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200 grams of macaroni</div>
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150 grams of corned beef</div>
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200 grams of grated cheddar cheese</div>
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300 ml of full cream milk</div>
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1 big onion, chopped into cubes</div>
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4 garlic, chopped into small pieces</div>
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Butter for sauté</div>
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3 whole eggs</div>
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Half a nutmeg</div>
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Salt and pepper to taste</div>
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Method:</div>
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1. Boil macaroni in salted water until al dente, set aside.</div>
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2. Sauté onions and garlic until translucent, put in the corned beef, season. Mix until the aromas are released.</div>
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3. Start preheating the oven to 200 degree Celsius. Bring down the heat and start putting in the milk, once at a time. After mixed thoroughly, mix in 3/4 of the cheese. While letting the cheese melt, mix three eggs in a separate bowl. </div>
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4. Put in the pasta and start mixing the eggs slowly into the batter. We need to keep the stove in low heat so the egg won't scramble.</div>
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5. Scoop batter into the pans, sprinkle cheese on the top, making sure to cover the whole surface of pan. This will create a nice crust during baking.</div>
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6. Bake for 45 minutes in 200 degree Celsius.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-45101800726367136872016-06-07T09:53:00.000+07:002016-06-15T11:00:42.090+07:00My Top 5 TV ShowsI hate watching TV, but I love TV Shows. I often watch it on my laptop, killing the life of my laptop slowly but surely. I feel like it's a thing about millenials; they like to <i>binge watch</i> things. Falling into the category, I am sure that I prefer waiting a season to finish and then binge watch it, rather than waiting one episode every week.<br />
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In this post, I'm going to tell you about my Top 5 TV Shows that is <b>much better </b>to binge watch than wait weekly. Thankfully, most of them are either finished or been going on for quite a while, so if you're starting to live this amazing experience that is <i>binge watching </i>tv-shows, these shows will not disappoint.</div>
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<a href="http://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/04/01/6359507871284388961579832814_Gilmore-Girls-gilmore-girls-336905_1024_768.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/04/01/6359507871284388961579832814_Gilmore-Girls-gilmore-girls-336905_1024_768.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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1. Gilmore Girls (2000-2007)</div>
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Tomato Rating: 90%</div>
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This show is set in an eclectic town of Stars Hollow, telling a story about a mother-daughter duo we all want to be. Lorelai and Rory Gilmore is 16 years apart, but the connection you gained will be a lifelong relationship with the character. Lasting seven seasons, we can really see how the character develops throughout the show. I personally grew up watching this show and it definitely shapes me as a person. Luckily, this show is coming back for the penultimate final season, consisting of 4 hour-long episodes, launching in Netflix.</div>
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<a href="http://imgfave-chat-herokuapp-com.global.ssl.fastly.net/image_cache/1356582792650955_animate.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="226" src="https://imgfave-chat-herokuapp-com.global.ssl.fastly.net/image_cache/1356582792650955_animate.gif" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://imgstocks.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Game-of-thrones-season-1-tv-dvd-scanned-covers-1190x768.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="257" src="https://imgstocks.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Game-of-thrones-season-1-tv-dvd-scanned-covers-1190x768.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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2. Game of Thrones (2011-now)</div>
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Tomato Rating: 94%</div>
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We cannot talk about TV Show and miss this one. Game of Thrones is a brilliant show, with complicated story plots that will not stop killing off our favourite character. I learned it the hard way that you cannot get attached to one character, because the moment you are rooting for them, they will be either beheaded or stabbed or basically, dead. It is a brilliant show, and even though not for the faint-hearted, it is worth to watch.</div>
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<a href="http://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/ftpuploads/bloguploads/funny-cartoon-screencap-bobs-burgers-knee.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="223" src="https://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/ftpuploads/bloguploads/funny-cartoon-screencap-bobs-burgers-knee.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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3. Bob's Burger (2011-now)</div>
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Tomato Rating: 89%</div>
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Bob's Burger is a funny, cynical, dry joke type of cartoon that is targeted for adults. My favourite character is Louise, which is the youngest of the bunch. This show is really fun to watch and I find myself coming back for them everytime I'm looking for a nice, light watch to rewind.</div>
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<a href="https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ_R9uxRsuYe52x138jNHS-HmFEY0mk0mT5P1kf3JNC26YGDdUX" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ_R9uxRsuYe52x138jNHS-HmFEY0mk0mT5P1kf3JNC26YGDdUX" /></a></div>
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4. Sherlock (2010-now)</div>
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Tomato Rating: 91%</div>
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The main reason you should be watching this show is because Benedict Cumberbatch, but if you need further convincing, it is a really well-written show. The shows has brought so many cinematography innovation, one of them being innovation in showing text on screen. This show is quick-paced, witty, and smart.</div>
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5. Friends (1994-2004)</div>
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Tomato Rating: n/a</div>
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Two words: true classic.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-32532318155383116532015-09-07T01:15:00.000+07:002015-11-06T09:45:14.189+07:00Six weeks of ex(change)*spends 3823423 hours looking for writing music*<br />
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I always start a blog post with "phew it's been so long" or whatever statement emphasizing my inability of religiously updating my blog. WELL. I don't know. I feel like the older you get, that excitement of sharing anything to the ~whole world~ gets thinner. Or I'm just lazy. Because I'm barely twenty. Also, I think I grew tired of having one year of, countable essays, yet tiring pages of sentences that revolves on everything except me and my interest and my activities (YAY FOR NO MORE ACADEMIC ENGLISH). I had to fake it so much, I pretended I'm interested in 'rookie problems of starting a business'. I have no interest in starting one, although I'm majoring in one. Hashtag consultant career. Hashtag pretending to have it all together when in fact, not. This hipocracy of me did put me away of writing creatively, and sometimes when I have ideas of posts I just... Sigh and "let it be". Energy be like, slim to none, more to a none.<br />
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So. The big deal of college, for me, is the summer break. 3 MONTHS OF NO SCHOOL, YO! I don't hate university, I kept saying to myself it will be beneficial for me. BUT, it gets tiring and... Repetitive. Being a snobbish, self-contained, and ~driven~ young lady that I am, of course I already planned of doing something for summer. I might have say something about being an AIESECer in this web of thoughts (read: fancy name for a blog, or me being used to 'elongate' my sentences to maximise ~word count~), and I joined this program called... GCDP. Global Community Development Programme. Basically, it's a cultural exchange programme, so you will go to a country doing some volunteering projects, and expected to grow a leadership sense, at least for yourself, by making an impact, no matter how small. For five-eight weeks, usually. You can pick ANYWHERE in this world, as long as your destination likes you. Like, I have 100+ options, but each projects have requirements and certain specifications. If you're a business student, you can't apply for a volunteering project about healing certain part of the world of a health disease. If you're an engineering student, you're less likely to get accepted to a project that helps people startup their business. You get me. Out of my gazillions options (seriously, one country can have up to twenty projects, most likely to be more than that. AIESEC is in 120+ countries. Boom, how about that for an organization), Malaysia picked me.<br />
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Yes. Malaysia. A country two hours away by plane, from Indonesia, with a history of quarrel over an island, culture, and songs. With similar food, similar language, even similar FACES. Basically, when I tell people "I'm going to Malaysia for my project", they all went... "Are you sure?"<br />
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Of course I'm pretty sure, but, I set my expectation to... Almost nothing. I have no idea what I will do, but I believe everything will have an impact in your life. Everything affects each other in a magical way, because you might be a princess. Just kidding. But who knows. Personally, my theory is that my owl got shot on his way and my Hogwarts letter never came. Great Britain and Indonesia is PRETTY far. Maybe an owl's limit is China.<br />
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BUT. I also have fears that I'm not pushing my limit, and that I might not bring any impact or develop myself. I mean, it seems so near. My trip to Papua when I'm 10 took longer than this, and even then, I wasn't making any impact or learning about myself other than 'maximise your use of electricity, we might not have one tomorrow'. Maybe I was also too young back then, but also, I know deep inside, <i>I was not myself for settling small. </i><br />
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Boy oh boy, was I wrong.<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/j7oRjfLt-YE/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/j7oRjfLt-YE?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe></div>
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The video will show you what I did. But here, I will tell you how I feel.</div>
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You know that feeling of being familiar to something, yet it doesn't feel the same? The feeling of being <i>so close, yet so far</i>? That's basically me for six weeks straight. I kept seeing the same kinds of people, eating same kinds of food, having the same sceneries, going to same malls layout, seeing rhw same Sephora and Kate Spade, but it doesn't feel like home. It feels like everything is lying to me. It feels like you're not supposed to have a culture shock, but you did. Everything was similar. Even the (seated) toilets are the same, but the spray bidet is different. I cannot get ANY Indonesian food. Which was funny, because in Indonesia, I never crave one. I never have a <i>soto betawi </i>craving, I have sushi craving. I never wanted to eat <i>rendang</i> so much in my life, I would kill ~people~. I do that to a medium rare, rib eye steak. What's more funny is that you can find <i>soto </i>and <i>rendang </i>in Malaysia... But again, it's different. It doesn't taste like home. AND THE LACK OF VEGETABLES. </div>
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tl;dr of paragraph above = everything seems like a lie and I was doubting my survival. I feel like bathing in <i>kuah soto </i>while munching on <i>emping</i>, if you know what I mean.</div>
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That particular feeling shocks me the most because I thought I was... Safe. I thought I didn't have to spare my energy to adapt. Exhibit A of why you shouldn't be a know it all, and that things might be different with what you expect them to be.</div>
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On top of that, I have 30+ EPs coming from different countries and mostly all of them are complaining about the same thing. So much negativity. During the first day, it was goal setting day. A week after, I was unsure about my goals, I was unsure if my goal will succeed.</div>
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However, my #1 key learning of this experience is that the development that you expect to get, might not exactly be the development you will get. But the point is, development is still development. I travelled to lots of places with a Russian friend, something I will never get if I stayed in Indonesia. I got to learn others' trivial culture that will never ever make it to the books and the encyclopaedias. I didn't learn others' culture, I experienced them. I experienced eating a goat cheese cube that tastes like.... Armpits. Each of them is rewarding.</div>
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My believe as an AIESECer is that you should never leave an experience as the same person. I left, and I changed, for the better.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-28495205041142459612015-05-02T00:22:00.000+07:002015-05-02T00:22:19.214+07:00Nineteen<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">
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Turning 19 was... A bit strange. I always feel like 19 is such an odd age. Even I was hesitant about celebrating. It's like... You're not in that twenty area yet, but you're too old to act like you're in your sixteen, living fearlessly and screaming "YOLO" on the top of your lungs. You're too old to be living in crop tops and short shorts, putting flowers on your heads and losing your voice to The Cure's Love Song. Even some musicians hitting the charts are almost as old as you are. Even Dora is all grown up now. You have bigger responsibilities and a bunch more expectation to pay up. Your past is adding up. I knew I'm always going to be nervous about turning this 'old'. To be quite honest, some people still feels super duper young in their 30s... It's kinda ironic that I feel like 'this is it' for me.</div>
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I was always a planner. Ask me what will I be in 5 to 10 years and I will answer it very clearly, very quickly, without hesitation, and it is incredibly detail-oriented, down to the brand of the shoes and the bags I'm wearing. Very optimistic. I think of every single decision I made, what's the long-term impact, what's in it for me in the long run. I am very boring. You won't see me jumping off a cliff on a single rope bounding my ankles, it's too risky. You will see me exhausting myself on my job, though. I always knew I need that 'safety net' protecting me 24/7, I need a plan B for my plan B. My risk is your average Joe. I count my mistakes. I think of my mistakes. I regret, sometimes way too much than I should.</div>
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My wish for this year is that I let go. To be less perfectionist, to stop tiring myself thinking which shade of pink my best friend prefers. I want to be young, I want to make a huge load of mistakes and not feel too sorry about it. To embrace the smeared eyeliner and the unsaid I love you-s, to accept that a 'D' does happen once in a while... That it's worth the laugh. It's okay to cry, to disappoint and be disappointed. It's funny because it was never about other people. It was always me, limiting myself.</div>
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So to 20 years old Brina; I know you're going to look back to this post and see what was going on during your 19th birthday. Well, the 19 year old you wants you to be happy, healthy, and in love. With yourself, with the people around you, with your routines, with your homework that we all know it's currently piling away somewhere. The 19 year old wish you never stop trying to let go, to eliminate negative thoughts, to be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself. To live.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-32547396131577468802015-04-08T00:28:00.001+07:002015-04-08T00:28:35.726+07:00Oops... I did it again.Leave it to Shabrina when it comes to creating goals and /not/ reaching it. I believed I missed two posts already? Yeah.<br />
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THIS IS A HAPPY POST! I hope I'm not dorky.<br />
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So I want to tell you about the Easter Break!<br />
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As a non-celebrating cult of the holiday, I and my Mom decided to go on a road trip to Mt. Bromo in East Java. This is my first time of being actually 'alive' for the moment, as my last visit there was when I am... Around two or three, which basically is redundant. To be quite honest, I was not really into the hiking and sightseeing part. Going to Bromo means I can drop by to Malang and meet my friends. Yep. That's actually the objectives. To meet friends. How ~extroverted~ of me.<br />
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(P.S. If you believe in Myerr-Briggs personality test, mine converts from <b>I</b>NTJ to <b>E</b>NTJ because of college. How about that as a development of my personality. I think I spent less time with myself too, as my lonely time is usually accompanied by hundreds of words essay or papers, or some kind of homework that needs a huge amount of attention to deal with. #CollegeLife #nbd)<br />
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Thursday night, I went on a plane at 8 to Surabaya and arriving at Juanda Airport at 10-ish and I went straight to the mountain. How optimistic, I might say. We arrived in the before Bromo area (where phone reception is still widely available, I have no idea what is the area is called BUT there is a gas station. Gas stations=sign of humanity) at 2 AM in the morning. Yep. 2 AM. I slept throughout the journey from the Airport to the Bromo area and was wide awake during the trip after. For me, I think of it as the 'receptionful' area was Cipayung and we are heading to Cipanas, where things can get messy sometimes. The road was more extreme than Puncak though, as it is literally two small ways at the edge of the cliff. After that, we got off to get to our jeeps (fun fun fun). We were chasing the sunrise at Penanjakan 1. Some said that Penanjakan 2 have a better view but we need to, like, hike 800 meters in a cliff-y kind of trail and I was in no mood of doing anything physically challenging. The place was PACKED. My jeep can't park far, near the top so we have to take <i><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3bf25618-1756-493d-8417-28a5cadf959f" id="f7d32f98-fda2-485b-bc47-55820e86926a">ojeks</gs> </i>to the top. The beauty of Indonesia, right? Imagine being in Iceland and wanting an <i><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3c70a9da-e7f5-4ae1-8abf-9397240b8401" id="dd719776-23c6-4b8f-bd10-9e24bb33e643">ojek</gs> </i>so bad. Or maybe a dog sleigh? I don't know. It was quite cold, but just the air con type of cold. It gets freezing though, but because I was so into capturing the sunrise, I didn't realize that my hands were frozen and glued stiff to my camera. The sunrise was beautiful, though.<br />
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How awesome is that. After that we went to the crater, or <i><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="bfe46d50-45a3-4abe-802c-3b45c9f1bc34" id="42bdca7b-a448-45b2-ba0f-059012b69676">kawah</gs></i>. I took some pictures blogger style, but as always, it will fail at some point. We had to take 200+ steps, but don't be discouraged because it is actually easy <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="48af1bd3-eb64-497e-bd9c-a8e1ceb1ad99" id="840d49aa-7f31-4370-ac80-8c0262c8e92f">peasy</gs>. It is pretty uphill, but it is quite safe. On the top, however, is where things get a little creepy for me. I am not usually afraid of heights, but I am sure of fearing that my clumsiness somehow will lead me falling down into the crater and being eaten alive by the mountain. It was creepy, and I didn't spend much time there. I saw one guy walking quite high and all I was thinking about "WHAT IF HE FELL DOWN THERE WILL BE RIOT HERE." Anyway.</div>
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I am closing my eyes with fear. The next part was the fun part! The <i>Bukit Teletubbies </i>and <i>Pasir Berbisik</i>. It is REALLY cool.</div>
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It was so fun. The sceneries were so easy on the eyes, and I took lots of pictures. This is BTS:<br />
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To be quite honest, I am not the easiest person to shoot with. I am very hard to 'chill' and need to do a lot of silly things first to break the ice.</div>
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After all of that I met some of my friends (!!!) I met during AIESEC conference, and went to Surabaya to meet my family.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-72171512545882302282015-03-14T00:16:00.001+07:002015-03-14T00:16:08.869+07:00Settling for lessI know I missed February updates... Time just flies easily when you're having fun. This post however, is not your usual walk in the park.<div><br></div><div>I tried sleeping but it doesn't help. You know when they say <i>"if you can sleep on it, it's not a problem, everything will turn out fine."</i></div><div><i><br></i></div><div>Not this one. This is me being really really unhappy.</div><div><br></div><div>At first I don't want to let this out in text. I want to leave no track, no history of me ever telling someone about this. I want to talk it out in person... But no one was available. So, might as well fill this empty space without naming names, conditions, real life situations, personal pronouns or anything that will giveaway a clue whatsoever.</div><div><br></div><div>Lets just say you're in a relationship with someone you really care about. Whether it is your friend, or your boy/girlfriend, whatever. You think know everything that is to know about this person, but you were wrong. What you knew it is only one millionth of it, and you found out another side of this person that completely blew your mind, with it being 100% different on this person brand image (ugh) (so sorry for technical terms) (it's quiz period guise).</div><div><br></div><div>It's like a huge slap in the face, is it?</div><div><br></div><div>For me, it's more like a huge betrayal, stabs-in-the-face kind of feelings. No longer a slap... It's actually stabs. There's also a bit of humiliation. No idea why. I'm just so ashamed.</div><div><br></div><div>I can never see this person the same again. I feel like talking to this person, like<i>... </i>Ugh. Can't think about the word. This bothers me so. much. But it is so scary too because I'm not supposed to know that this person is not like the person that I know. Slick.</div><div><br></div><div>SO COMPLICATED URGH.</div><div><br></div><div>I'm almost 20 yet I still have troubles communicating how I feel. I think this is why our generation makes up almost 40% of world's unemployment. <i>Communicating problems</i>. Just like a dozen billion breakups via text that our generation is so keen about. Ten more lines and I will turn this rant post to an essay.</div><div><br></div><div>That's it, I guess? I kinda have no one to talk to lately, and I have a lot of things that are left unsaid. Apparently, having no expectation still kills you. Might as well expect and get sad.</div><div><br></div><div>I don't know. I'm just disappointed.</div><div><br></div><div>(You kinda have to agree that I'm a better writer when I'm upset. I'm so weird when I'm happy. I'm a total dork when I'm happy.)</div>Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-41089151370634431432015-01-31T17:59:00.001+07:002015-01-31T17:59:22.073+07:00January: Busy<div style="text-align: justify;">
So first of all; one of my goals of the year, other than get skinnier and prettier (ahem, the last drops of my puberty dose, please!), is to post at least once a month in <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="ba581747-727e-4ccc-b9c9-e6568d467367" id="afd29ae8-274e-4668-80b4-bb54af9c7ba1"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="5272cb18-6421-426b-ab9d-523d5156409f" id="a21f0303-9f84-4cef-af6f-dbb1c9ee4a49">[ </gs></gs>parenthesis<gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="ba581747-727e-4ccc-b9c9-e6568d467367" id="6a9f0b4e-36b5-4194-a23f-742027a21da6"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="5272cb18-6421-426b-ab9d-523d5156409f" id="35bed310-3af1-44ab-a391-80a0050c84f8"> ]</gs></gs>. The post will include my story about how my month has been, my monthly favourites, and my goals towards the next month. Let's just say that in 2014, this blog is not pretty at all. Minimum posts and broken links everywhere, mostly because I delete a lot of my Instagram pictures. Not guilty.</div>
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January has been a lot busier than I thought it will be.</div>
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Other than having three big, major course-related projects at school along with finals week, I have AIESEC, I have my social life, I have Rayhan, I have laundry and dirty dishes, and I have myself to take care of. The cliche story of Brina's <i>having-too-much-on-her-plate.</i></div>
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I started January on a vacation like a normal high schooler. My University gave two weeks break at Christmas and New Years, so that was nice, but is sure does slow your brain down. I have a hard time being in focus again in class and ended up getting nothing in my brain. I remember doing a lot of reviews and re-writing a lot of my notes because I felt like nothing makes sense. I will be adapting a new, note-taking strategy along with recording most of the lectures so hopefully, something like this won't happen again.<br />
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As for AIESEC, I am the organizing committee of Local Conference 2015 (YAY). Sadly, one of us doesn't do his job so others ended up doing a lot of his work. It got so busy that I don't even have time to wash my hair, so all I did was complaining to Rayhan about everything. I haven't met him in proper ways since December, by the way. It's kinda crazy since we go to the same university, yet we never have time to meet each other. Our schedules have been clashing since day one and he is even busier than me. I met my other friends from other university more often than him *insert grin.<br />
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Favourites!!! Nothing beauty because January has been... Me doing nothing to my face. All I did was draw my eyebrows on (with this <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd6WgdfbqZAuKeVI2d9PgPaMz089uPpGzGESwBg7BQ7jpI2tsxEWhQRYw_fw4gzF7E8TvnikpHV8dBDifyRTJVImR5JZsCiw627F0rsqFapaMqKaxVz4n2s9nvSFF0ifRHwHmI6AHO0Rqa/s1600/Viva-eyebrow-pencil.gif" target="_blank">eyebrow pencil</a> in dark brown or this <a href="https://www.benefitcosmetics.com/product/view/gimme-brow" target="_blank">eyebrow gel</a> in medium/dark) and wear <a href="http://www.lazada.co.id/sebamed-lip-care-stick-spf-30-101624.html" target="_blank">lip balm</a>. Although I started a new ritual by putting <a href="http://www.vaseline.us/Resources/Images/NoSeal-VSL-7p5oz-Original_tcm1636-347509_tcm2571-777579.png" target="_blank">vaseline</a> on my lashes and brows. My favorite song of the month will have to go for Ellie Goulding's <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJtDXIazrMo" target="_blank">Love Me Like You Do</a>. I listen to it during my workout <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="1f104696-368f-49cd-b8fe-49597bedf7fb" id="deaf9914-99e4-4b03-a962-3c9fc3719adc">sesh</gs>, my study <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="1f104696-368f-49cd-b8fe-49597bedf7fb" id="ce1dcf29-849c-4e5d-942d-bebc3df72285">sesh</gs>, in-the-bus-getting-home <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="1f104696-368f-49cd-b8fe-49597bedf7fb" id="283e1ee5-d827-497b-857c-c65e8289af5a">sesh</gs>, everywhere. Obsessed. My favourite outfit to wear to campus is a shirt and a skirt with sneakers like <a href="http://lovelybylucy.com/wp-content/uploads/midi-skirt-with-sneakers-boyish-sports-look-710x1072.jpg" target="_blank">this look</a> since I did a lot of presentations and it's nicer when you present yourself with a pair of skirt rather than jeans.<br />
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Goals in February will be <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="ae87f9df-1340-4f14-bbc5-a0911210f44f" id="2e0bf0f4-1b10-40c8-a678-7f59fba38c70">sooo</gs> simple. My goal for February is to go out at least 4 dates with Rayhan. Two months are insane, guys... Insane! :))<br />
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Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-76621277298624437862014-12-22T14:09:00.003+07:002014-12-22T14:13:41.527+07:00Whoa... Right? I can't even start on how empty this blog is.<br />
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It's almost 2015, and I kept saying things like, "Udah Ganeshout <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="813a43b4-d78a-4157-acba-e206eda9170a" id="204c8346-129d-49d3-87da-fc3ffa8fa2a3"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="573bb2b5-b8d6-47d9-98d7-34d888c0fe9c" id="969185a0-3e96-4855-9c42-6a5ade25be8f">aja</gs></gs> <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="813a43b4-d78a-4157-acba-e206eda9170a" id="7fe007c8-08da-4efc-aa3e-780f560c9df2"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="573bb2b5-b8d6-47d9-98d7-34d888c0fe9c" id="18ee7254-b98e-4bfc-b951-178c1fbfda4f">ya</gs></gs>..." "Udah <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="813a43b4-d78a-4157-acba-e206eda9170a" id="7eb641ba-5ad4-4577-a489-81a49d016115"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="573bb2b5-b8d6-47d9-98d7-34d888c0fe9c" id="b8dd7e61-c130-4b24-9cf1-b7a09abe72aa">pada</gs></gs> Outdoor Study <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="813a43b4-d78a-4157-acba-e206eda9170a" id="2fd189b7-d2f4-49bd-8bea-60a7465f6031"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="573bb2b5-b8d6-47d9-98d7-34d888c0fe9c" id="845ce1f6-6de3-4ca6-8db3-9c44f5c7615a">aja</gs></gs>..." "Bentar lagi UAS... UAS <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3dd88129-bd8e-4363-9204-7a0856fc1fe8" id="cc985ca4-f80e-426a-bd04-63223d35b599"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="fde6ec3e-e8bf-4671-a950-40579408e5c5" id="0e70defb-8975-493e-8d60-710b4d880d8e">anak</gs></gs> <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3dd88129-bd8e-4363-9204-7a0856fc1fe8" id="f6231b7c-bde4-46ef-b062-e92fdcb64863"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="fde6ec3e-e8bf-4671-a950-40579408e5c5" id="fc50806c-170a-4bce-9183-3a80687e1833">kuliah</gs></gs>..." to myself when contemplating on how this y<gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="46d5840a-29e7-4108-acdf-f7c5ec7eb33e" id="2e224f75-d918-4f1f-9e1d-73a2ba633529">ear w</gs>ent by <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3dd88129-bd8e-4363-9204-7a0856fc1fe8" id="33273ea3-4733-4233-a3cb-0aa8f13741b9"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="fde6ec3e-e8bf-4671-a950-40579408e5c5" id="b5ea5f21-ab79-4b63-9472-6ac53bbe1c0e">soooo</gs></gs> fast. I didn't even open this blog anymore, even my link buttons are broken --> and I haven't fixed it up a bit.</div>
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Let's see. I want to recap what happened with me during 2014:</div>
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<b>January</b></div>
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So... According to my <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="d0751eb7-cea3-4c0d-a616-645ab97814fb" id="cf0ca1f5-ed95-4907-b59e-978c2cf01ca7">instagram</gs> page, I went to a wedding and there was <i>Pembekalan </i>for seniors in high school. That was so fun. I remember doing a lot of <i><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="979026a0-63be-4b04-a903-a5b160f4c02c" id="c0f487bd-0cb5-441b-917f-68f1308bbf8f"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="59a606e2-dbff-42a5-887b-42302866e04f" id="a44fc320-60f2-4030-b77d-aed1c36b921b">qiyamul</gs></gs> <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="979026a0-63be-4b04-a903-a5b160f4c02c" id="b41d621f-6056-481c-81c1-0ceacc054f1a"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="59a606e2-dbff-42a5-887b-42302866e04f" id="8e00719e-645c-4bbf-b564-f60667aeb0e7">lail</gs></gs> </i>and because of that, I got the best student award thing. I was so proud and a bit confused. I thought I had the worst development during high school because my grades are degrading and I'm not as excited as I was in terms of learning. I was a bit of a trouble during high school, but again, who doesn't? This month is also the month I bought the clip-on fisheye lenses. Hashtag so important.</div>
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<b>February</b></div>
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This is where the stress kicked in, right? RIGHT? I went to another wedding, but this time, it's with my best friends. <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="cd8fb93f-8c92-406d-8612-75f54b4c163f" id="ec5ba494-5c69-4609-a815-1b7409b02ce6"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="488eb1b9-da39-491f-8d93-9fe1f3dfa85f" id="cd46d87f-8e3d-4081-9be0-2fdca5f953f7">Geng</gs></gs> Optimis <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="cd8fb93f-8c92-406d-8612-75f54b4c163f" id="a770beef-b685-436e-931c-b2b47af91e31"><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="488eb1b9-da39-491f-8d93-9fe1f3dfa85f" id="142d9c32-720f-4689-a120-2d99346a155b">ftw</gs></gs>. This month is also the month I gave up on Perguruan Tinggi Negeri. I got accepted to the university that I am in now, and let's just say I was so happy, ecstatic, excited, and totally have no clue on what's going to happen next. I also have a fabulous, <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="ee7945cc-ab76-4f5f-a3ea-b4d0485847c9" id="4f07a2d5-3f8b-4b5c-a200-8adf2434dfd9">kickass</gs> body at this time. No, really, I fit XXS and I swear to god I'm so pretty skinny.</div>
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<b>March</b></div>
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So. Stressed. For. UN.</div>
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(No time for life)</div>
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<b>April</b></div>
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Birthday month! I was excited to turn 18 because it's still 18. I'm not excited to turn 19 now, because at some point, I still introduce myself as a 17 year old girl. Sorry world. This month was the last <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3062eaa1-beff-41b8-96f2-31ad6375a330" id="689677b6-ee2a-4058-9df5-3d0adf106b82">classmeeting</gs>, my first (and last) <i>Malam Bimbingan Taqwa</i> or <i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i></i><i><gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3062eaa1-beff-41b8-96f2-31ad6375a330" id="425be412-e335-4e87-9245-01abd4e2917b">mabit</gs></i>, voted <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="3062eaa1-beff-41b8-96f2-31ad6375a330" id="8985afa5-bb4b-4ea8-af59-6f1c259b5e26">for</gs> the legislative election, chopped my long, tousled, perfect hair down to my shoulders, totally dying on UN (cried 2/3 days, no big deal) and had an amazing birthday by doing a run and brunch afterwards. I guess early this month was also the time that I realized I fell in love with my best friend... :)</div>
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<b>May</b></div>
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This month was very... Relaxed. I literally have nothing to do until September, which is when first class is happening. I was busy cheering for my friends, and preparing for graduation. That means watching Michelle Phan 24/7 and trying a bunch of makeup looks, working out so the dress will fit better... Graduation was on the 28th, I got a bouquet of flower (from Kakak, <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="470b58a9-2cce-4329-862d-9693a76c21a7" id="ffaa8d21-7e46-47c1-8901-14eaee8fff59">yay</gs>!) and had a lot of fun. 'Us' was official this month, but no one kinda knows.</div>
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<b>June</b></div>
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We told people. It was crazy. His birthday was on this month, so we exchanged gifts (it took him TWO months to give me my birthday gifts. Let's see if next year he'll do better). Although it was late, it was still the sweetest thing I ever received. I never knew he had that in him. It was funny for me, being in a relationship and all, because I was single throughout high school. I kinda forgot how it feels to have someone to share all the things, and to have someone to say all the fuzzy things. At the end, I went to Dufan with some friends, went to Surabaya for a week or two (can't remember) and starting Ramadan in Surabaya.</div>
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<b>July</b></div>
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I got fat. Ramadan didn't affect me AT ALL. The most special <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="8b8ad9e9-2cdb-4ec5-a426-7553c268434d" id="9f08a651-bb34-484f-978a-1d1e9e3f7a4a">buka</gs> <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="8b8ad9e9-2cdb-4ec5-a426-7553c268434d" id="5f06a9e3-ab92-4934-87fe-6a35f90ace9a">bersama</gs> is a tie between the one with Bharatayudha and the one with me and him and Alif and Diva. I spend Eid Al-Fitr in Semarang with my family. 2014 is the year of travelling.</div>
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<b>August</b></div>
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Oh, August. Things went crazy for a bit. I went to Tanjung Pinang for a long time, preparing things for my Uni there. Briefing day happened, and also Inauguration. We wore the same Alma! </div>
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<b>September</b></div>
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W-days, P-day, Outbound. Going to Bandung to visit a friend for the first time. First day of class on the 22nd and I sat on the farthest back. I spent a lot of money on my first week...</div>
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<b>October</b></div>
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Nothing special; just a lot lot lot of assignments.</div>
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<b>November</b></div>
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Midterms! But managed to go to Bina Insani Fusion Student Concert, Bali for 4 days, and joining the most FUN part of this year: IYLC 2014. I'm a proud AIESEC-ers. IYLC really opened my mind. AIESEC is a great organization, guys. I know joining in the organization, it is and will be really hard, but if you could, be free and because you only lived once, join several programs that we made like GDCP and GIP. I promise you, what you'll find and feel and experience will exceed your expectation. Went to Jazz Goes<gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="09ed31f3-0bd8-46f0-817d-d472431a7f99" id="c829d7a9-9abd-44e4-a143-951734d7f54a"> t</gs>o Campus and...</div>
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<b>December</b></div>
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... Marked another first thing to our milestone calendar. I cried. Felt terrible. I can't believe it's already December. I've been dating him for seven months; that's five months to go to our first year. I've been in Uni for three months, and add another month, I will finish one semester. I've done countless assignments, learnt tons of new things I haven't learned in high school, falling in love endlessly with the amazing guy I'm with, having new friends on campus, keeping in touch with my old friends, being involved in my organization, and tons of other things.</div>
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A lot has happened to me, and not all are shareable. I want to be more committed to blogging in 2015, but it's so hard to omit the details, but sometimes I don't want to attach the details. I'm learning a lot in 2014, and to be honest, if I could pause time and stay in this year, I totally would. My days are so much better than my previous years. I am so happy in 2014 and you knew who's the reason behind it.</div>
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I'm just saying, boys and girls, go out there and find whoever it is that makes you happy. Stick with them. I'm not suggesting that your happiness should be based on others, but having someone to share everything, to talk about everything, to laugh with, to cry with, to be angry with no absolute logical reason with (believe me, he's so strong and nice and amazing for being able to handle my crazy mood swings) that makes you happy 24/7 is kinda great. Wait, no. <gs class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark" ginger_software_uiphraseguid="a38e5c43-756a-4177-88d6-2e3e74b91061" id="bc92e15e-f27d-4bb4-b029-b0154f47b5cd">Not</gs> kinda. It's great.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-50879724072833594272014-07-12T23:32:00.003+07:002014-07-12T23:32:56.897+07:00Getting in and not wanting to get out of it<div style="text-align: justify;">
And by it, I mean a relationship.</div>
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The last time I dated was junior high going to high school. It's been a long, long time. It wasn't anything like love, though. It's more like a game. He knew it, I knew it. It won't last. I know it was a mistake, a messy one. Getting in a relationship when you're still too broken won't get you anywhere, because you're the only one who can save yourself, heal yourself, and brace yourself for a new 'adventure'.</div>
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At some point during high school, I thought I was ready. I jumped in, I fell hard, with no consideration. I wasn't thinking very clear, I guess? It was too fast and before there was 'us', it broke. For a numerous time. We tried fixing it, but in the end, I gave up. I mean, it was hard, but I regret nothing. I went over a denial period too. <i>I don't need a boyfriend. There's no time for dating. I guess it's my time to find myself so I know what I'll be looking for</i>. </div>
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Let's just pretend that we know that those made up shits are indeed made up shits. </div>
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There's only one thing I look for, and it has been that way for years. Comfort. Of course for me to be comfortable around someone will be hard because I have, like, a dozen of cards and they won't unfold easily. Plus, I like having someone to 'come home' to. It's just so comforting that out of seven billion people in this world, there's one person who won't be too tired to listen about your day and won't be too bored to know that you have exactly the same kind of day everyday. The one person that can't wait for the night to come so he'd have all the time to talk to you, and to say good night to.</div>
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And for the last... I don't know? Five months? Maybe five months or even more, I've found that person. I guess the universe is finally doing something right. He was just a best friend. I mean, he occasionally flirts but that's just how he is. I expect nothing because he's kind of everybody's best friend. But some things lead to another things and somehow we're kind of dating. Long story short, add another month and we're officially dating. Officially dating. It's kind of big and (of course) unexpected yet expected. I kinda knew he was the one for me, that even if I can't have him, he raised the bar of my expectation much much higher than before.</div>
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It's kinda funny when the platonic love I always have for him turned romantic. I mean, there's no <i>pdkt </i>for us. Everything before dating was <i>pdkt </i>but it wasn't intentional. It's just like we already knew each other so well and decided to fall in love together. I mean, I used to relate love with roller coasters and being so scared about what's going to happen next, not knowing whether should I dive in head first or dipping my toes one by one because <i>you'll never know what will happen. </i>In this scenario, I still don't know what will happen in the next minute but because we're in this together, it took out the scariness. He took out my insecurities and for some reason, it's not that scary anymore. He made falling in love less scary, but not less insane. I still have butterflies. I still catch myself smiling crazily over good night texts, even though it's the same format every night. My heart still races every time I'm going on a date with him, even though the second I saw him, it all became worth it. Because he's so worth it.</div>
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I guess things will eventually come to you when you're ready. Not just love. The cool thing about this, though, is that I never knew that I was ready. It was a huge surprise, better than seven trips to Disney World (I'm not kidding. It's DISNEY WORLD. It's a big deal to me) or eating bacon without risking being burned in hell. This won't be easy, but I guess I won't give up this time.</div>
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Nope. Not this time.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-90679605744556495512014-06-26T09:13:00.000+07:002014-06-26T09:15:06.769+07:00And the 'three words, eight letter' thing goes to...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">♥︎ I never thought that you would be the one to hold my heart, N.</span></div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-86991818674469219652014-05-13T17:37:00.001+07:002014-07-19T13:13:41.548+07:00... Back? For a bit.Errr. It's been a while.<br />
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I'm not so sure I'm even capable of writing posts anymore. Let's try.<br />
<span style="color: white; text-align: justify;">I</span><br />
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Updates on my life... I've had my 18th birthday! It was wonderful. I wanted to try something a little different so I didn't do the usual dinner party hosting. I took two of my best friends out for a run (yes. A run. On my birthday) and even though I ended up walking and bitchtalk everyone with 1/3 of the crowd, it was so fun. We took the bus, eventually. The distance was so far and I'm a pussy. Afterwards, we went on Brunch and watch a chick flick on the theatre. My first wisher was Jeje (yay for six years friendship) and the second was very special. I am avoiding personal pronouns here but let's just say I didn't regret staying up that late when I have to be up that early.</div>
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<span style="color: white;">Love</span></div>
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One of the highlights of May was going to see Spider-Man. I didn't watch the ones with Tobey Maguire but last weekend I watched the second one. Somebody said it was the worst version of it, I thought it was okay, but I do loved the Andrew Garfield's version more, because #EMDREW #STONEFIELD. It's a relationship goal, you know. To not work when you work. I kinda feel like the story was a bit pushy though. I prefer the first one, but, it was not the movie that makes the event significant.</div>
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<span style="color: white;">You</span></div>
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Oh, this month is graduation month. With the national exam being one of the hardest thing I've ever did in my history of learning, I really hope everyone did great and pass and just continue with college life. It's really hard, though, with all the cheats and the answer keys because it really put me on the spot. I hardcried twice because I was so afraid.</div>
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<span style="color: white;">so much</span></div>
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College starts September 22nd. It's still a really long way to go, is it?</div>
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<span style="color: white;">Boyfriend! :D</span></div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-52316654163838644832014-01-14T23:08:00.001+07:002014-01-14T23:08:34.678+07:00Please, do whatever you want, fear. Hello 2014. So far it's been great and yes, I only blog when I can't sleep. It's an impulse-activity when I'm wide awake.<br />
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So I stumbled across tumblr and found this:<br />
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<i>Please do not feed the fears</i></div>
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I think like I know it all, but I know I'm feeding my fears. My fears are nothing but obese contextual things that lived only in my mind, and they're ready to gain more weight.</div>
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I'm not going to stop feeding them because fear is the thing that drives me right now. I'm a tangled strands of an obese fear. My list of fear is never ending lines and that includes things that super obvious but never was in my eyes because the fears are blocking my sight. My list includes things that are super impossible and never gonna happen, but the what ifs in my brain are making up excuses and scenarios on how will it happen, when will it happen, and how will I feel when it happen. My list includes a list of songs in the past with the memories with it. My list includes people. My list includes tragedies, and the repetition of it. My list includes my past, my present, and my future, written in big capitals, followed by a how-to guide to ruined them, since I'm a professional in ruining things uncontrollably.</div>
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I am so afraid. I can't stop feeding my fears, they'll eat me.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-31952047561412344202013-12-31T23:55:00.000+07:002014-01-01T05:20:13.808+07:002013 and how it always feels like it's 2012 to me<div style="text-align: justify;">
I almost thought I'm celebrating the transition from 2012 to 2013, when I realise it's only a collection of heartbeats to 2014.</div>
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Time flies so fast when you're having fun.</div>
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So... 2013. I have done great in cleaning up my life. Eliminating the bad, getting out of unhealthy relationships, start working out, eating well. I really think I did well in 2013. So here's the list of 20 lesson I've learnt (and applied) in 2013:</div>
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1. Somethings are better left unsaid.</div>
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2. Being an idealist is more tiring than being OCD 24/7.</div>
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3. Money can buy happiness, but the things that matter doesn't have a price tag on them.</div>
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4. The best way to kill time is to do nothing but reverse crunches on the bed and pretend you have a pet cobra (just for fun).</div>
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5. Being openminded is key, but having boundaries is the essential alarm that goes with it.</div>
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6. There's no such thing as changes, we just suck at adapting.</div>
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7. A pair of a statement shoes is the only thing you need when it comes to being stylish.</div>
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8. You don't miss the person, you miss the situations when s/he was around.</div>
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9. Time heals all wound, all anxiety, all things actually, but it's the extra push that gets you through.</div>
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10. Every girl needs to have a strong eyebrow game and a self esteem of concrete so she's not bothered to watch a movie or dine alone.</div>
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11. Fit is the deal, being skinny hurts.</div>
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12. Listen to your heart and let the brain finish the process.</div>
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13. Bitchface all the way.</div>
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14. Embrace the butterflies, the sparks, the sudden heartbeats, the great feeling of hugging every single person in the room.</div>
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15. Everyone deserves to be happy and you should never be in their way.</div>
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17. Home cooked meal will always taste better.</div>
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18. Love shouldn't be spoken, it should be felt, and it should feel good.</div>
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19. Look for rightness. It only took one person to snap me out when I know the whole world is actually helping me.</div>
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20. Shoot for a flat stomach; even if you failed, you still got great arms, athletic shoulders, and probably squeeze in the bonus which is a thinner silhouette of your body.</div>
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(still shooting for flat stomach!)</div>
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Resolutions? My resolution for years to come is actually just one; be a better version of myself. I think it's easier to see everything in a big picture rather than listing it one by one on small details and at the end, you'll feel so good about yourself because if you achieve <i>it</i>, you'll learn so much more. Sure, learning a new language or do 100 squats a day sounds more realistic than my resolution, but things will eventually fall in place when you try to be the best that you can.</div>
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2014 will be very hard. It will be a bloodbath. I wish I could slow down because thinking it all kinda drives me insane. I think I'm not even ready for everything because I read UN as a screaming prefix un- not Ujian Nasional. I am still not ready for physics in any form and I couldn't bear to think how well I will do in UN. 2014 is less than half an hour away, and I'm bracing myself for anything. This is the year of my turning point and it will be so much bigger than having a new, awesome, pair of shoes.</div>
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Am I ready? Nope. I'm taking the biggest leap of faith to myself this year and I know that my resolution is really simple, but I have a lot of expectations I would like to indulge in the next years to come.</div>
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So here's to 2014... May the tears that I will shed, the sore that I got from laughing, the hugs and the hate and the time pulls me together, to a better version of me.</div>
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Oh! Number 16 was this:</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhcv37_1efVomO7ov5Fe4rBVMDlQGD5_TlwAjh6ip9uso86V479a889HUcZw0RbC7hBUbAf4SQPUF2RXOGHAj1CWgjDzdexowVbKGZ7f2OId0y45xa_Z_rPziL9uQCzT5p36aC5putpfeu/s1600/IMG_5974.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhcv37_1efVomO7ov5Fe4rBVMDlQGD5_TlwAjh6ip9uso86V479a889HUcZw0RbC7hBUbAf4SQPUF2RXOGHAj1CWgjDzdexowVbKGZ7f2OId0y45xa_Z_rPziL9uQCzT5p36aC5putpfeu/s320/IMG_5974.PNG" width="213"></a></div>
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Start letting the <i>right </i>people in. They're there for a reason and that reason is to wipe your tears and tell you that <i>it's gonna be alright</i>.</div>
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2013... It's been a blast! Not really sad though, I blogged 58,62% less than 2012! :D</div>
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Song of the year: definitely... Oh man. This is so hard. Err............. </div>
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What</div>
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As</div>
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SOTY</div>
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Hardwell's Dare You featuring Matthew Koma.</div>
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Either that, or Lana Del Rey's American.</div>
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Or Ariana Grande's Honeymoon Avenue.</div>
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BYE 2013!</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-77015191740871499442013-12-18T18:00:00.000+07:002013-12-18T18:00:05.755+07:00Turning Twenty<div style="text-align: justify;">
Words cannot even describe how much gratitude I am feeling just by having her, even with the 300 miles apart.</div>
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Three class meetings, so has it been three years? The days are long but the years are awfully short, but with you it has never been short of happiness. </div>
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I may not always be the good sister that will always listen, I may not always be the good friend that will always be so cheery when you told me about some news, I may not always be the good girl that follows the rules, I may not always be the bad girl that always breaks the rules, I may not be a good enough student to make you proud, I may sometimes be a little off-track with my things, my mistakes are repetitive, my flaws are cover-proof, but I will always know that:</div>
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You're like a sunflower in the middle of a sun kissed, green, vast meadow. You're like the gleam of lights that we see on the surface of the sea. You're like Cumulus, floating effortlessly in the sky. You're like coats of mascara that I will never leave home without. You're like a pint of ice cream in a post-breakup scene. You're like a bouquet of flower in a pre-date night scene.</div>
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You are comforting, uplifting, connective, and probably a million good things in the world that dissolves into one single human in the world.</div>
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You are getting older, but you'll be the same person to me: The one who I run to, the one who I vent my emotions to, the one who I ask about things, the one with more greens in her plate, the one who will (eventually) lead me to adulthood, the one who will always be there. I, too, will be the same person to you: your always little, your kepo-woman, your best friend, the girl who will be as dizzy as you will at that special day, the girl who eats way too much of red meat, the girl who's only a text, a phone call, or a tap away.</div>
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I know a lucky girl. She seems to have everything but turns out, there's one thing that she's lacking. Being a lucky girl that she is, God gives the missing part of her and it turns out to be a sister.</div>
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P.S. That lucky girl is me.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-52825805012256068212013-12-14T18:46:00.002+07:002013-12-14T18:47:26.394+07:00Quiet<div style="text-align: justify;">
Since everybody's not in town, and by everybody I mean <i>everybody</i>, I spent today cleaning and having a quiet day at home. It's still almost seven and I actually still can go out somewhere but the car is being borrowed and it's raining non-stop since this morning (I got two loads of laundry sitting in the machine because getting it out would ruin them) and it's just feels reaaaalllyy good to have no screw-y sound in the background.</div>
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I used to be so attached to my TV at times like this. It must be on, 24/7 at all costs and blackouts scare the hell out of me. But lately, Mom gave me options on either TV or internet and of course I chose the internet! Frikkin crazy. So... Yeah. I stopped binge-watching on The Kardashians, I lost track on Scandal and ANTM, I catch news by my phone and the paper. The only time the tv's on is either on movies or food channel. I have come to a point where TV sounds actually gave me headache. Well, maybe in a week I'd watch a thing or two (I think I can't wait on my Mom's approval to watch SATC on a DVD-basis, I don't want to miss out on a major it cult of the 90s!) like... I don't know. I can't make up something, I guess I'm off the TV too long :))</div>
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So when my friends told me to watch this this show, local, called <i>Diam Diam Suka</i>, I just don't know what to say because a) I never watched local soap operas before! The only time I was addicted to a show is when Glee went viral and a heart-throbbing me, patiently waiting for Darren Criss to recite lines and beam his amazing god-like persona and b) Gossip Girl put my standard really high on soap operas so I'm definitely hesitating. Turns out it's so <i>hilarious</i> and let's just say that I'm glad I don't like watching TV. I'm just really glad.</div>
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I'm so excited for <i>The Hedon Trip</i>. Oh wait. It's still half a year away! Alright. I'm so excited for New Years Eve. I don't know where actually I will be spending them but a busy fireworks finale is always a must have.</div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">FIREWORKS!</span></div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-9261824297047500512013-12-05T19:47:00.000+07:002013-12-05T19:48:03.124+07:00I'll always be...<iframe frameborder="no" height="166" scrolling="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/104468155&color=6a615b&auto_play=false&show_artwork=true" width="100%"></iframe><br />
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<i>If you ask me, we go to the movies because we want to see fairytales. A sleeping queen woken by her true love's kiss. A princess who puts aside her jewels to make her way in the world. Lovers torn apart being brought back together. But life isn't a fairytale. And happy endings are few and far between. In life the young queen becomes a tyrant. And takes her subjects to war. So that's why we need movies. To remind us that, despite it all, love can still spring in the most unlikely of places. And that sometimes, even fairytales can come true.</i></div>
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P.S. Lol, yeah, I'm soooo bored studying for finals.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-63070060239729166792013-12-01T13:07:00.001+07:002013-12-07T12:41:44.651+07:00Bandung and the bits<div style="text-align: justify;">
It's that time of the year; <i>Outdoor Study </i>time. Until now, I still don't know why it's called <i>Outdoor studying </i>because we weren't really <i>outdoors </i>we're just outschool, if there's such thing. Plus, we're not actually learning something. I think field trip would've been more appropriate but hey, I'm not the one in charge so I really shouldn't care.</div>
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This year we actually went out of Bogor and Jakarta. My first was Bogor-Jakarta (IPB and UIN), second was Jakarta (UI and Dufan), and this year is Bandung (UNPAD and UPI, plus what so called <i>Kunjungan Wirausaha </i>to Lembang Floating Market).</div>
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I'd rather go to, like, Paris van Java (a mall. YES. A mall. Judge me) but it wasn't on the option when we chose yet the responsible teacher said "We will not go to Paris van Java because you guys chose the floating market." and I remembered I just sat there and thinking "What?! It's not even in the options?! If it was, I'd chose that over a heartbeat." I mean, it's more <i>entrepreneur-esque </i>than some funky floating market that we actually have (and way much cooler) (not naming names).</div>
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As usual, we went per bus and this year bus sucks. We usually have boys in our class in the bus. We did have boys though, but they're like, two years younger. School, if you're reading this, please continue that tradition because I kinda want everybody to suffer. I'm lucky enough to have fun chaperones, so... Fine. I'd be having fun with my girls anyway.</div>
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I did have fun. But, it's not as fun as having boys in the bus like the last two years. I sound really slutty right now, but believe me. Having boys in the bus would ensure us of having great music, laughing tons of laugh and getting some sleep on the road.</div>
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When we got to Unpad it was already late and I wasn't really listening because none caught my attention. My shoes though, demand some affection by being broken. Thank god for superglues.</div>
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When we got to UPI... It's a whole different story. I have a familiar face there, YAY! Yay for Kamal and his awesome schedule of lectures so he could actually be there. He kinda kidnapped me(?) and put me on trouble... He did showed me around UPI and it's huge. He showed me his classrooms and the library and the canteen. If it weren't for the surprise and the lack of my cellphone battery, I'd took lots of pictures of UPI and with him. After was the floating market and you could see mine (and gengless, 'duh) <a href="http://instagram.com/p/hS3kvxskMG/" target="_blank">instavid reaction</a> in my <a href="http://instagram.com/sashbrina" target="_blank">instagram page</a> and let the pictures do the talking.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtktVCDUvvO8e-qW6uWXwEfdNcCgOAtBpulo8GKiZc-D8DYEpGKsVA8asHhxh9qPCY_ROXUwW43byrnfqAUy3gaaXkZHeblQGDBx3ydouRftBBePGE43_zAPRNieQa259eXxmR3fn8AFfk/s1600/IMG_5215.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtktVCDUvvO8e-qW6uWXwEfdNcCgOAtBpulo8GKiZc-D8DYEpGKsVA8asHhxh9qPCY_ROXUwW43byrnfqAUy3gaaXkZHeblQGDBx3ydouRftBBePGE43_zAPRNieQa259eXxmR3fn8AFfk/s320/IMG_5215.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">[ obligatory gengless and gengless+ selfies ]</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiohua-Q8eU13y96V-UYg25QDEt620GlPnO15nrCE8O8toqrlyASqkOy6j1gzXMGYQkv5krsZh6lpChJLsLa9pjQ76gMkRI-gv_P0e280k3vWUyBh5YSmKvIr7VAZz8kaVtbfBGHl9dnYRO/s1600/IMG_5221.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiohua-Q8eU13y96V-UYg25QDEt620GlPnO15nrCE8O8toqrlyASqkOy6j1gzXMGYQkv5krsZh6lpChJLsLa9pjQ76gMkRI-gv_P0e280k3vWUyBh5YSmKvIr7VAZz8kaVtbfBGHl9dnYRO/s320/IMG_5221.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUXjrh12woIbUhAL5t_8lZ6Q7pwyZ2lvr0WVqcTUHlvi_gCVIHytVUkodk4uXKBvITJO1ZyIobTn97OFvVDkGTmApe9C09RU6BSUcYlWCRQz5nql6xEmsbQFoIzVtjdGpbESlXAId4vfYB/s1600/IMG_5222.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUXjrh12woIbUhAL5t_8lZ6Q7pwyZ2lvr0WVqcTUHlvi_gCVIHytVUkodk4uXKBvITJO1ZyIobTn97OFvVDkGTmApe9C09RU6BSUcYlWCRQz5nql6xEmsbQFoIzVtjdGpbESlXAId4vfYB/s320/IMG_5222.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXCtb5VkB1GH7CH86UkTjPp_dgBHgxhCATdlHrUS6AcrTm51e-0UGbeTUMrm5IOMwMpcSgUZDuCDlOBNhYSj2KPnXL_c9tJ8IH-l6Wp2Mi4LrolhE9WR74IrmqazRuMcfIpjgrSLeRULp3/s1600/IMG_5257.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXCtb5VkB1GH7CH86UkTjPp_dgBHgxhCATdlHrUS6AcrTm51e-0UGbeTUMrm5IOMwMpcSgUZDuCDlOBNhYSj2KPnXL_c9tJ8IH-l6Wp2Mi4LrolhE9WR74IrmqazRuMcfIpjgrSLeRULp3/s320/IMG_5257.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">[ teacher selfies because they're awesome ]</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPsPx0fdAl8Dtk0Hyiuhd8tMCnd9Ncf6QN902pIHVYlhyChlfGy0E7jrRbRUJ7tFRyz5KoFd_qwDOIqIltLY9CejxqUj_ELlc8IOg-_QAu6Ljc9KBppm_s4_dzMD0fQFzYHZ5yxt_f6s9Z/s1600/IMG_5262.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPsPx0fdAl8Dtk0Hyiuhd8tMCnd9Ncf6QN902pIHVYlhyChlfGy0E7jrRbRUJ7tFRyz5KoFd_qwDOIqIltLY9CejxqUj_ELlc8IOg-_QAu6Ljc9KBppm_s4_dzMD0fQFzYHZ5yxt_f6s9Z/s320/IMG_5262.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">[ this needs one word only; best! Abiw's photobomb is awesome though. First picture 'hello people hello world Abiw's in the house yo!' second picture 'lol im done photobombing people']</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcgTdjE_dId4I4layaTL8MpqVt-hC6xWlDOjF_l5m0CHCizKNwTNAG-uABVtmhVh6KoRoYwBvrUso5aN2nBhZ4cTqOkLKCYfkjNaJj0_RxKXIKHxe1yzbZO98qlQp2ChgI5VeY69oc7HVR/s1600/IMG_5237.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcgTdjE_dId4I4layaTL8MpqVt-hC6xWlDOjF_l5m0CHCizKNwTNAG-uABVtmhVh6KoRoYwBvrUso5aN2nBhZ4cTqOkLKCYfkjNaJj0_RxKXIKHxe1yzbZO98qlQp2ChgI5VeY69oc7HVR/s320/IMG_5237.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">[ I can't believe I'm saying this; I wouldn't be myself today if it weren't for this guy ]</span></div>
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It was great though, if you only think from the 'spending great time with my friends' side. And now... As for the finals...</div>
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Yeah. It's NBD that we didn't make our own exams and decided to use the <i>expert mode</i> exams. It's N-B-D.</div>
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(+) <a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/kat-george/2013/10/30-things-every-girl-should-have" target="_blank">This is now your guide in life</a>. Make a button of this to put on the sidebar as an appreciation, 'kay?</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-43148446604494749372013-11-21T19:11:00.001+07:002013-11-21T19:11:49.239+07:00Working and stayingPerks of having a swolemate: you have no reason to quit. I've been working out regularly for almost a month now. Working out regularly as in slipping 30 minutes of cardio and 30 minutes of lifting everyday, eating clean, thinking positive and surrounding myself with so much love and support so it would feel less tiring. I am also filling my schedule really tight, with only three free days a week so I wouldn't even have time to think about <i>problems</i> that I should not even have to deal with at the first place. I am definitely better than yesterday... I'm juggling a lot of things at once and I love the feel of it. My feeling that this year is going to end great is actually happening...<div><br></div><div>Anyway.<br><div><br></div><div>I feel like my studying intensity has cranked up a little bit high since I'm maintaining knowledge from both subjects. Each and every day, the desire to stay actually grows and all I've done is nothing but serving it a big amount of care and support. It's not that I don't want to leave... I feel better <i>staying</i>. I think this is the first time I'm sharing this thought out loud, because I've had so many question from others and what ifs from me, along the journey. <i>What if I can't deal with a minus ten degrees? What if it's too scary and it's a handful to handle? What if I missed my Mom? What if I'm not supposed to go there, I mean, dear God Almighty can you show me something? </i>What's more funny is that I factor 'friend' waaayyyy too often during situations, like <i>will it hurt my friendship with A </i>or <i>am I still going to reach B quite easily </i>when on the contrary, my friends are moving to every part of the world. I could just imagine how much fun and experience they will go through, and that my reasons of staying may seem a little bit scared and paranoid, but I <i>actually </i>want to stay...</div></div><div><br></div><div>Only for the first two or three years, though. But I guess that decision is final.</div><div><br></div><div>I want me to stay.</div>Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-48433288491457750222013-11-09T16:54:00.001+07:002013-11-09T16:54:22.288+07:00Queen of Di-saccharine<iframe frameborder="no" height="166" scrolling="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/92481254" width="100%"></iframe><br />
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I tested my study-tenacity with several songs... I mean, I need to be exceptionally focused when it comes to studying. When I came across Lana, I gave it a try. I mean, it was my jam for most of 2012 for a reason, right? I put National Anthem on and was hooked, I kinda forgot I listen to other songs other than Lana's.</div>
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Not until recently that Lana has a major list of the unreleased ones and Queen of Disaster was my song of the week. I kinda can't wait for her next album; she's such a goddess.</div>
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This week was super sweet.</div>
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I can't remember anything though, but I know it was super sweet.</div>
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My best friend celebrated her first monthversary... I got a taste of the new Gingerbread Latte (I can't say that I like it though, holidays are just defined by venti, for kids, toffee nut latte on an early Sunday, catching a read and finishing homework) and to say that I'm ready for next week is actually perfect.</div>
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Today is cheat day (I think I'm the only one on the team who's established a <i>cheat day</i>, hahaha. He's so discipline when it comes to fitness and diet) and I finished a single serving cup of Coffee Haagen-Dasz only to be confused on the calories thingy. You know, the label. I'm used to english and 'calories' that the japanese readings confused the hell out of me.</div>
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I never thought a cup of ice cream would scare me this much.</div>
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P.S. Thank you, <a href="https://soundcloud.com/kaskade/lana-del-rey-young-and" target="_blank">Kaskade</a>.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-57246640287500957102013-11-02T18:27:00.001+07:002013-11-02T18:27:27.860+07:00Pride, Ego, Need, and Selfish Ways.(I just wanted to say thank you)<br />
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<object width="320" height="266" class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="http://img.youtube.com/vi/I8tEcMjV_zE/0.jpg"><param name="movie" value="http://youtube.googleapis.com/v/I8tEcMjV_zE&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="http://youtube.googleapis.com/v/I8tEcMjV_zE&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;">I hope our path crosses someday. Someday. Just not today, tomorrow, the day after it and so on.</span><br />
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-20972394923502325232013-10-31T22:17:00.000+07:002013-11-10T09:18:46.588+07:00Ending October<div style="text-align: justify;">
All I knew is Alesso and Calvin Harris' Under Control is definitely the song of the month.</div>
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<i>You gain some, you lose some </i>is the most realistic quote ever.</div>
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My days has been nothing but BuzzFeed and relentless case of studying slash working out slash replying chats.</div>
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I've decided to focus on one thing more than the other...</div>
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But I definitely know that this month was awesome!</div>
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My dreams have grown into being featured in Kompas Sosialita to speaking in front of an audience in TED.</div>
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I have promised myself (and some other parties) that I will THIN myself out!</div>
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And Brina! Here's a reminder that...</div>
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a. You're turning 18 in six months. SIX MONTHS.</div>
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a.a. Feeling old already? YOU'RE NOT.</div>
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b. UN is only five months away.</div>
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c. So is that particular appliance test that you're dying to get your hands on.</div>
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d. But in the other hand, christmas is approaching in two months.</div>
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e. New Years Eve in two too.</div>
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f. Please don't give up in training those super awesome abs... You know (and he knows) that you hate the punishment.</div>
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g. Start looking around about infos on TOEFL-Prep!</div>
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h. You're never too busy. You just have a shitty priority.</div>
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i. Never give up. This <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0snNB1yS3IE" target="_blank">video</a> shows you why.</div>
Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-46980736207127339702013-10-19T17:15:00.001+07:002013-10-19T17:15:30.367+07:00*cough* No way *cough*The sick bug has finally caught me. I have a sore throat 24/7 and it kept me from sleeping since Wednesday... I barely caught some sleep. And to think it doesn't effect <i>anything </i>at all, other than the sick-y throat and the breathing capillaries sucks. I'd switch this with a nonstop sneezing flu at any cost but who would actually want to be this <i>sick</i>?<div><br></div><div>(No pun intended. Seriously man, jokes aside)</div><div><br></div><div>Other than my sickness, everything is fine. My best friends and I made a special group on Line (we're unstoppable now) and this week was super fun... Minus the coughing. I watched Gravity twice and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2, ate too much junk food, bloated my own body to a different kind of level, walked with an av. 2 miles? 3 miles? All that and top it off with the zero laundry I have done... The week's great!</div><div><br></div><div>I will spend tomorrow doing laundry (meh) and doing at least one of my movie homework... Aka the best homework ever.</div><div><br></div><div>P.S. I finally have my chance to be Jessa.</div><div>P.P.S. Fuck, they're taking the formal yearbook's photos in the next two days. That's it. Get me the #1 plastic surgeon in town. We need a quickie.</div>Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2907430982750966090.post-33432387316543149172013-10-12T15:15:00.002+07:002013-10-14T10:02:41.289+07:00What what what what.Update!!!<div><br></div><div>Nothing excited is going on my life!!!</div><div><br></div><div>All I've been playing online scrabble, watching Girls on repeat, listening to Miley's new album (go ahead... Judge me while you can), browsing about yoga studios and eye makeup tutorials.</div><div><br></div><div>Can we just talk about me, graduating in a bit???</div><div><br></div><div>Our yearbook theme is movie scenes. Of course I'm hooked with my two bests and we're planning a scene from a TV show... Or a movie. It's still kind of a blur. Our graduation colour is maroon and gold. I'm planning to give away a bit of surprise baskets, I'm thinking of giving away bouquets, I don't know. If there's a site that I'm always on nowadays, it's Pinterest. I'm carefully building my 'graduation' board and it's a secret board. I don't know why I made that board a secret when my dream wedding board is public. Yours truly have a bad case of sorting her priorities.</div><div><br></div><div>Like, lip stain or eyelash curler? Wait, don't lash out reasons! This is supposed to be effortless!!</div><div><br></div><div>(I think I'm a bit overwhelmed on the graduation party more than the <i>graduation</i> itself)</div><div><br></div><div>I thought I'm just going to leave high school carelessly, thinking nothing but <i>OMG FINALLY OUT, YAY???, </i>jumping up and down because "we're freeeee bitches yay we're freeee" but no.</div><div><br></div><div>All I could think about is how am I going to stay in touch with these amazing people that made my high school period so damn fun?! Can someone press the pause button? It's going too fast!</div><div><br></div><div>I read a cheesy tumblr quote that said "good things must fall apart in order for better ones to exist" or something like that because I don't remember, but that quote is so true. I've lost some things... And god replaced it with better substitutes. Like my earphones.</div><div><br></div><div>The thing is, my earphone is not comparable to the friends I have now.</div><div><br></div><div>And to see how easy it was, detaching myself from people I used to know best makes it even scarier.</div><div><br></div><div>Could you just keep the scrabble, the jokes, the rumours, the cupcakes, the secrets, the bitchy stuff we made of people, the feelings, the songs, the scoldings, the lunchtime, the everything coming?</div><div><br></div><div><i>In the end, what you do, isn't going to be nearly as interesting or important as who you do it with. (JG)</i></div>Shabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06065673587884070488noreply@blogger.com0